How long to bond with a guitar?

[Myopic Squirrel]

I expect everyone's answer to vary, but "on average"? Recently got a maple parlor (wanted to try a tonewood different from the EIR & mahogany guitars I own). Complicating things is making allowance for the parlor size - first one I've owned. Have played it intermittently the last couple of weeks and want to be certain I give it an honest shot - read too many "I let it get away" posts here. Thank you in advance.

[davidbeinct]

My three favorite guitars are all instruments I knew right when I played them that I wanted them. Any guitar I bought that I didn’t feel that way about, I wound up selling or have plans to sell now. I hope you have a different experience with your parlor but that has been mine.

[abn556]

My experience has been that after 90-120 days if I have not bonded with a guitar, its not going to happen.

[Mandobart]

This forum has many many threads about finding “the one”, numbers of guitars owned, chasing unicorns, etc. Also multiple threads about buyer’s and seller’s remorse.

You know yourself better than the rest of us do. There are some who just can’t “bond” long term with ANY guitar. OTOH, I’m one of those who learn very quickly to “love the one you’re with.”

When I get a new instrument I know within a couple weeks of playing it that it’s a keeper.

The only ones I’ve moved on recently (last 5 years) were starter/entry level instruments that were made irrelevant (for me) by getting one of higher quality.

[Jim Owen]

That’s a tough question, Tom.

I tend to bond fairly quickly, but there can be some adjustments that have to occur with different sizes and tone woods. I’ve never sounded good on maple guitars—but that’s my attack, I think?

Parlors take some getting used to. The scale of yours is short, so maybe go up a string gauge? The strings that sound good on Mahogany might not work well with maple. Have you tried nickel or monel?

[tommieboy]

If it's a good guitar, it still takes a couple of years to truly bond with it.

Tommy

[rllink]

The three that I have, I felt a connection right away. The three I traded for them I never did, and I had them more than a few months. There is more to each one than just the guitar itself though. They each have their own story.

[abn556]

I have 15 guitars now in what I would call a curated player’s collection. I point this out to say that I’m not collecting, but rather playing what I have. Over the years I have bought and sold many times what I kept, but having 15 keeper guitars is way more than I ever expected.

Lucky for me, when I met my wife when we were in teenagers, my best friend’s old brother had 140 guitars. So I can always say - “at least I’m not as obsessed as Jim” and she knows I’m only slightly obsessed compared to some….

[CASD57]

I probably don't give guitars enough time, But if I don't heard what I like within the first 10 minutes, then it's probably not going to stay

[L20A]

I have bought guitars that impressed my at the store but after being home with me for a few months, I find that I really don't like it as much as I thought that I did.
It is usually because I compare it the the guitars that I own and love.
I have tried to like smaller guitars but when I play them and then play my Dreads, they just don't sound good to me.

With all that said, it can take me several months to try different tunings and strings before I know of I really like a new guitar.

[LAPlayer]

I don't subscribe to bonding with a guitar. The guitar is the guitar and you are you, if you don't love it when you buy it..... all I believe you do is get used to it or accept it. I know it can take a more or less time for different people and different guitars but I know in minutes if I love the sound of it and an hour or two to know if I like the neck/feel of it.

[Coler]

Honestly, if it’s potentially a guitar I will buy/keep, I will know within the very first few minutes if it has that potential.

And consistent with that, if I am struggling to appreciate it at all in the first encounter, it won’t come home or if it’s online purchase, it will be going back.

Now, just to make sure, in regard to online purchases that don’t excite me initially I have keep them for a week so that they get a proper chance to settle in and get played a few times, and at different times of day. However I believe I am correct when I say that in each and every case where I have returned one, it’s been obvious to me from the first experience with the guitar that it’s not ticking my boxes.

In regard to buying from a brick and mortar shop, I would not make a large purchase without going back at least a couple of times to see if the guitar is still attractive to me. Of course you run the risk of missing out but my attitude is, there are lots of other guitars out there.

Of course, strings come into it - I won’t make a final decision without trying a couple of sets out.

So does set-up - if it arrives and plainly needs a set-up then that can be awkward - I remember receiving a new 000-28 that clearly wanted the relief adjusted and the saddle shaved down. I contacted the retailer and they were not happy for me to do that so I sent it back.

I think the stories of the ‘ones that got away’ mostly involve letting a guitar that was much loved go, for what ever reason, and regretting that decision later.

Of the guitars in my sig, the Custom Dread was a custom order from the maker - by that time I knew his work reasonably well so did not regard this as taking much of a chance. The Custom OM I bought from a brick and mortar shop with a good opportunity to try it out (albeit I did break my rule and buy it the same day I came across it, but it is a very desirable guitar). The 000-28 was an online purchase - I had tried a few in person and from online sources and this was the best one although who knows about the one they wouldn’t let me set up. The Lowden was an online purchase that I liked straight away and only got better in my hands. Same for the Guild. These are all keepers for me. I’ve moved on by trading/selling probably another 8 guitars. I’ve returned something like 5 online acquisitions to the retailers within their trial/return periods.

[edward993]

Originally Posted by LAPlayer

I don't subscribe to bonding with a guitar. The guitar is the guitar and you are you, if you don't love it when you buy it..... all I believe you do is get used to it or accept it....

Agree wholly on this! Too many romanticized notions with "bonding" and what not, IMO. Yes, I have "lifer" guitars because I love what they do for me. Guess what, that may change at any given time as my tastes, biases, or priorities change. And it has in the past, resulting in my selling guitars/gear that I had "thought" I'd keep forever.

I am simply of the mind that if a guitar (or amp, or pedal, etc.) doesn't wow me enough to buy it, then that speaks volumes at the onset. The second gate is whether I find joy in picking it up. Joy, satisfaction, desire! If that ain't there, then why try to "intellectualize" this so-called "bonding" process?

So how long? ...Tootsie Roll Pop commercial, anyone? A guitar (or gear) either fits one's style and tastes, or it doesn't, not unlike shoes. Why should I hem and haw over whether a shoe will "break in" when there are countless available that feel great as soon as I try them? So go through your playing, through your songs, over a few days even, and if the love ain't there, no point in "shoe-horning" it onto your foot

Edward

[abn556]

Originally Posted by LAPlayer

I don't subscribe to bonding with a guitar. The guitar is the guitar and you are you, if you don't love it when you buy it..... all I believe you do is get used to it or accept it. I know it can take a more or less time for different people and different guitars but I know in minutes if I love the sound of it and an hour or two to know if I like the neck/feel of it.

This is the reason I no long buy any guitars online. I have gotten lucky in the past, but over the past 20 years everything I bought and kept was bought after I played it. The only thing I have sold recently is one that I bought just off of pics on a store web site.

[lowrider]

For me it's either love at first play or nothing.

However, I think it takes at least 6 month to a year to get to know the guitar.