My marriage vs a Martin - Page 6

kayharley · #76 05-07-2016, 07:18 PM

Funny thing is I haven't played it yet...the couple of GC around here don't have it in stock so I'd have to buy it online, pick it up and then if it didn't feel right I'd be able to return it right then and there. But it's pretty much the same size as my Guild which is very comfortable, has great reviews, is simple and seems to have everything I'm looking for.

Somebody asked what would happen if I bought the Martin without hubby's approval. Probably nothing but I'd feel guilty. I really want him to share my passion but I doubt that will happen. He owns his own business and pretty much takes care of the major bills where my paycheck goes for the smaller things like food, clothes, pet supplies, cell phones....

My mom gave my sisters and myself some money a couple years ago before she passed away and I bought the Guild. I had (and still have) an really old guitar that my dad gave me that he had during WWII. It was playable but in really bad shape but I wouldn't sell for 10 Martins!
And so I then started to really get back into playing and now everytime I hear a song I absolutely love (and there are hundreds) I'll go online, find the music and hopefully a lesson to go along with it.
Hubby doesn't feel towards music like I do so I understand him thinking what I want is frivolous and unnecessary. We'll see....thanks again for the laughs and advice.

Godfather · #77 05-07-2016, 07:21 PM

I know, sometimes we want to hear what others have to say, but only you know what to do.

TBman · #78 05-07-2016, 07:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kayharley

Funny thing is I haven't played it yet...the couple of GC around here don't have it in stock so I'd have to buy it online, pick it up and then if it didn't feel right I'd be able to return it right then and there. But it's pretty much the same size as my Guild which is very comfortable, has great reviews, is simple and seems to have everything I'm looking for.

Somebody asked what would happen if I bought the Martin without hubby's approval. Probably nothing but I'd feel guilty. I really want him to share my passion but I doubt that will happen. He owns his own business and pretty much takes care of the major bills where my paycheck goes for the smaller things like food, clothes, pet supplies, cell phones....

My mom gave my sisters and myself some money a couple years ago before she passed away and I bought the Guild. I had (and still have) an really old guitar that my dad gave me that he had during WWII. It was playable but in really bad shape but I wouldn't sell for 10 Martins!
And so I then started to really get back into playing and now everytime I hear a song I absolutely love (and there are hundreds) I'll go online, find the music and hopefully a lesson to go along with it.
Hubby doesn't feel towards music like I do so I understand him thinking what I want is frivolous and unnecessary. We'll see....thanks again for the laughs and advice.

Take a picture of your dad's guitar and post it here for us to see. We love old guitars. Good luck with the 000. Let us know what happens.

Pitar · #79 05-07-2016, 07:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kayharley

I want the 000-15 in sunburst so bad! Hubby just rolls his eyes and walks away everytime he sees me on one of the many sites drooling over it. I only have 1 guitar, I play 2-3 hours everyday and I work. So.....should I risk it or be happy with what I have now?

Tough problem. Make it a mutual goal? I used to play as much as you do, making it pretty obvious what my passion was/is, but my wife dismissed it as a one-sided thing in our relationship. She was/is right. So, I took it upon myself to budget for what we both wanted. She got her kayak, I got my guitar.

Funny thing is I've since realized it isn't the guitar that makes the music. So, I divested myself of the high-end deception and bought a rather adaptable lower end guitar that does everything my hands are capable of. Passion leads logic. Eventually the latter gets to see the light of day.

kayharley · #80 05-07-2016, 08:16 PM

How can I put a picture on here?

kevin8122006 · #81 05-07-2016, 08:20 PM

I was in this same position once. I still miss her sometimes. Maybe.

TBman · #82 05-07-2016, 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kayharley

How can I put a picture on here?

Open a free account with photobucket and then post the link to the picture here in a post.

pickinray · #83 05-07-2016, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kayharley

Funny thing is I haven't played it yet...the couple of GC around here don't have it in stock so I'd have to buy it online, pick it up and then if it didn't feel right I'd be able to return it right then and there. But it's pretty much the same size as my Guild which is very comfortable, has great reviews, is simple and seems to have everything I'm looking for.

Somebody asked what would happen if I bought the Martin without hubby's approval. Probably nothing but I'd feel guilty. I really want him to share my passion but I doubt that will happen. He owns his own business and pretty much takes care of the major bills where my paycheck goes for the smaller things like food, clothes, pet supplies, cell phones....

My mom gave my sisters and myself some money a couple years ago before she passed away and I bought the Guild. I had (and still have) an really old guitar that my dad gave me that he had during WWII. It was playable but in really bad shape but I wouldn't sell for 10 Martins!
And so I then started to really get back into playing and now everytime I hear a song I absolutely love (and there are hundreds) I'll go online, find the music and hopefully a lesson to go along with it.
Hubby doesn't feel towards music like I do so I understand him thinking what I want is frivolous and unnecessary. We'll see....thanks again for the laughs and advice.

Kay - I'm not going to give you any advice here, but I hope it works out and you get your Martin. You deserve it!

YamaYairi · #84 05-07-2016, 08:32 PM

If you can get paying gigs, save up your money and buy the guitar. That is the arrangement I have with my wife. I can spend my gig money on whatever I want.

jp2558 · #85 05-07-2016, 08:34 PM

Take him to a boat show. Then go look at dock rentals and membership in a boat club. All of a sudden a guitar is a bargain, that is if he's not a boater. If he's is, buy him a boat, and you then get at least two guitars.

kayharley · #86 05-07-2016, 08:36 PM

jeffnles1 · #87 05-07-2016, 08:51 PM

Kay,
I haven't read through all 6 pages so if this has been said, forgive me.

I've been married to the same woman for 34 years. Over the years, we've had up times, down times and middle of the road times.

I've found through all those years the absolute best thing is to sit down and have a conversation about it.

If you really want that guitar, tell your husband that you really want it and that it means a lot to you if he is OK with the purchase.

If it's not grocery or rent money and if you do not have a lot of debt or are saving up to pay off debt, then no harm no foul. But be honest with yourself and your spouse.
1) do you have credit card debt? If yes, you don't really need the guitar
2) do you have student loan debt? If yes, pay it off before you get a guitar
3) Are your house and car payments more than 50% of your after tax income?
4) Medical debt? Tax debt? You guessed it.

If your debt is under control, if you really want the guitar, just tell your husband you really want it and ask for his support.

If my wife comes to me like that (she wanted a pretty expensive camera a while back for her photography hobby) we talk about it and given the fact I love her and if we can afford it, no issues at all. Same when I want a new guitar or banjo, we have the conversation, and she says sure, go for it.

Jeff

opencee · #88 05-07-2016, 09:06 PM

I spend a lot of time in music stores. I love guitars. Playing them is one of my favorite hobbies.

My wife and I raised five kids. They all went to college. That was quite a load. I grew uncomfortable indulging myself with any unnecessary purchase.

So many times over the years, I'd come home and my wife would ask me where I was. The answer was often, "I found a place to play somebody else's guitars." That really meant that I went to some music store somewhere. She'd smile and never complain.

I can only remember two times she ever went into a music store with me. Both times, I found a guitar that I liked. One was a 000-15, like the object of the OP's desire (That was 2003.). The other was a Custom 00-18DB (One year ago.). On both occasions, she said, "I think you should buy that guitar." I immediately went into anxiety mode. Each time, she pushed me to the purchase.

All my other instruments were purchased before our marriage and kids. The best of them had been sold off. It was hard for me to make those post-marriage purchases for myself. I still haven't gotten over taking care of the family first, even now, as the kids are all adults.

I really appreciate her pushing me every once in a while to indulge myself. Although, seeing the results, I'm tempted to take her guitar shopping more often. I'm joking. I never want to abuse her support.

I often play quietly in the same room as she reads or watches TV. She never complains.

opencee

.

TBman · #89 05-07-2016, 09:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kayharley

If you can post a picture of the label inside, if there is one, that would help too. There's a member here, that specializes in restoring these and selling them - http://vintageparlorguitars.com/
He may be able to help you date it and tell you who made it. Many companies made these guitars and sold them with that brand name. You might want to start a thread about this guitar and get our resident experts working on it.

Warrenaines · #90 05-07-2016, 09:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kayharley

I cook wonderful dinners, keep an immaculate house, bring home a paycheck and the only other thing I've ever really nagged about wanting is a small greenhouse.

JFC, if my wife did half of that I wouldnt hesitate for a second about her spending a couple grand on something she really wanted even if I didnt specifically understand the need. And a good Martin is something that will last a lifetime and if financial circumstances change for the worse can be sold if needed. It's likely one of a handful of things in your house that is retaining most of its value. If you're both working, a couple grand each year likely gets spent on lots of things that vanish into the ether.

All that said, it is obviously best to fully discuss. Why do you need 2 guitars? Why does a golfer need 14 clubs (much less more than one driver, putter etc.)?